Vicki, that’s awesome! I had my boys doing regulation pull ups at the park yesterday evening & I’m so flippin proud, among many other things, that my 5 & 7 year old boys can do 8 pull ups in a row. I received a couple funny looks, but I just smiled at the other parents & went back to encouraging their desire to do more.
Thanks for sharing Vicki.
You mentioned your babysitter, but you have no one to watch the boy? You also mentioned that he doesn't have many friends because he is homeschooled and sees a group of friends every other week. Do you think that is fair? If he had friends, those friends would have parents that I'm sure would be willing to work with you and your partner. Of course some type of action will be necessary to change that.
Homeschooling is not the particular issue, however it does seem to be alienating your son from what some would consider "typical" youth behavior; that being regularly active and socializing with kids his age. One of my idols, Tim Tebow, was homeschooled, however he and his 5 siblings lived on a farm. They were all extremely active and had each other to play with, in addition to their daily chores which were physically challenging. I can say with confidence that if Tebow hadn't been extremely active as a young kid, he would not have become a national sensation in his field of football. After joining youth sports at local schools, as one member suggested to you, he did attend public high school from which he graduated. Tebow did not start his career in high school, it began when he was 5 years old. When he was 11, he was stronger than his father and learned to compete with his brothers and friends. Had he watched TV and video games growing up, no one would know his name.
I would not let my son play video games and watch TV as much as it appears yours does and you admit that's most of what his day consists of. There are life and social skills TV can't teach him and he won't be prepared if he isn't exposed to them. If he's more "grown up like" than you "in many ways", I suggest you have some growing up to do. The TV will not make him strong and his body is growing and changing; hopefully he won't whither away before he gets a chance to use it. You owe it to him to find a way to integrate him into society and regular activities. I'm much more concerned about him, rather than what your partner wants to do about the gym.
I excerpted this paragraph from the entry under the Weight Control support group, entitled "the secret to losing weight". With some apologies to the author (making the language a little more PG-13 and on point...)
"Stop telling me you don’t have the time and energy or the stamina [ed. note Or the opportunity to take your child to an AF gym] to exercise. You are making excuses. I made them too for so long and at 270 pounds I had to stop telling myself I can’t and start telling myself “do whatever you [bleeping] can and move”. Don't tell me you wish you could go to the gym or afford a trainer[ or take your child with you]. YOU ARE MAKING EXCUSES. Can’t afford to go to the gym? Make weights at home (milk gallon jugs filled with water make a great start). Can’t afford to take a class or go to yoga, rent videos from your local library. Walk everywhere. Park farther away. Find a building with multiple floors and climb the stairs. DO SOMETHING…ANYTHING."
See, it sounds to me like excuses. "I would, but... she would, but... our child would, but..." just do it! There are 1,000 reasons not to, and just as many to quit. And only 1 to hang tough and do it. The most important reason of all-- you.
I joined the gym two months ago but it took me two months to decide. My husband and I are in Mississippi with no family, but need to lose weight was a no brainer for me. Needless to say he now comes with me. Just start and the rest will fall in place. Let him connect with other teenagers and have the couple time at the gym.
I just wish there was a "24 hour option" for those who would like to work out with there kids. Sadly my son is allmost eleven and has never played an organized sport (baseball, football ect). In highschool I was mainly a track, wrestling, cross country guy and seldom if ever watch sports at home (although my significant other is a huge football fan). However, the gym is somthing that I do every day and something that I believe I could convince hime to do. At the very least it would offer my significant other one less excuse for not going (not that she needs any,she pretty much does what she wants without excuses).
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